Grooves…
OK, I’m trying my hand at this writing thing again. I wrote a story last week, but somehow through the vagaries of technology or the result of just plain blind misfortune, either fat fingers or some sort of Gremlin in my smart box had caused that tome to evaporate into the dark recesses of that mysterious cyberspace labyrinth… the nether reaches of the unfathomable Ethernet… the domain of serious nerds and geeks only, and I for sure ain’t either! Anyway…
Tomorrow I’ll have been on the road two weeks, and this is only the second time I’ve felt much like writing. The first time I did what I thought was a rather creditable job of capturing the feelings of discouragement I’d been feeling and of the general indifference towards continuing this trek. Actually, I’d already made the decision by the time I’d written that piece to just return home and wait for better times, if things didn’t improve soon… a time when I was not in a weary, unfulfilling rut.
I’d left out on this trek in good spirits, though, but the cumulative effects of rain, long days in the saddle trying to avoid as much precip as I could, and low energy due to fatigue and the absence of excitement, had left me in a down state of mind. I was discouraged and just not on top of my game…
The difference between being in ‘the groove’ or in ‘a rut’ is not a matter of feet and inches, it is a function of attitude, perspective, and expectation… Is the glass half full, or is it half empty? Yes! Either way the volume of content is precisely the same, however… I, quite simply, had the wrong view of things to properly engage in this sort of spiritual travel…
Seeing is believing and facts are indeed facts. How we interpret those ‘facts’, however, determines what we actually think we see. No two people can view the exact same set of ‘facts’ and see precisely the same thing. Our ‘data base’ constructed over the course of our entire lives provides the backdrop for us to evaluate ‘facts’, and our ‘state of mind’ – our mood, our prejudices, our predilections, the things we’ve previously accepted as truth – fill in the detail for us… I suppose I just wasn’t seeing things in my usual context…
What changed my mind was a sequence of unrelated events that began with stepping out of my motel room that fateful morning on the day of the turn-around… In the stillness (rare for usually breezy west Texas), the sky appeared as an ink-black blanket with sequins strewn randomly about and a tiny sliver of a brilliant silver crescent moon… I’d thought to myself at that moment that if I’d had a prayer rug handy, I’d probably have been tempted to face towards Mecca and drop to my knees… but I didn’t…
I thought happy thoughts about how we’d finally made it through the rain, and that except for the cold, we were facing relatively decent riding conditions for a spell. ALI was doing quite well… ummmm, except for that seeping fork seal on the port side… nothing bad or gushing, just a persistent, ever present slight weeping that won’t go away. I should have that looked at one of these days…
At least I should be able to make it home without any of the stuff we’d ridden through to get this far… There was an inexplicable lift from just turning that emotional corner, though… Do I really want to return to that danged ol’ recliner and all that it represents? Of course I don’t, but… So far, I just hadn’t been enthused the way I should have been… What gives here, I inquired of myself…?
When I stepped back inside, the ebony fluid so vital to a return to conscious awareness was ready for ingestion, so I proceeded to give myself a clearer more realistic view of the new day… I checked the weather forecast. Temps in the low 20s, high forecast for the day to be only in the low 40s… more wind, of course, but no rain, though… Hmmm…
Soon enough it was time to step back outside, and… huh? The sky was cloudy by then, daylight was just beginning to make it possible to make out objects across the parking lot… and… there were what appeared to be a few small ‘wet spots’ on the pavement! I glanced over at ALI’s cover, and sure enough there were some spots on there, as well… only they were shiny…? Sleet! Back inside, I checked the local radar again, and sure enough there were some spotty ‘pale blue’ clouds on the map for down our way.
Nothing of any consequence, and the generally tolerable forecast remained positive… By now a combination of not wanting to ‘recline’, that incredible pre-dawn sky, and the unexpected sleet had combined to both challenge me and inspire me to stay the course! A sudden but profound change in plans… I would ride on… continue the ‘coddiewomple’…
A goober grin adorned my face as I cheerfully went through our pre-ride rituals… do the three Ss… pack the bags, then load them… warm-up ALI… mount and depart… North instead of east, however, as my mind had become resolute… No more apathy, indifference, or malaise… nope, all that had been replaced with resolve and a modest but growing level of enthusiasm! I thought I’d found my way back from the rut and into that so far illusive groove!!! I was correct…
That elusive groove is not something you go and find… for it must find you. It will only come to you, however, when you are ready to receive it… when you are in the proper, receptive frame of mind.